Toronto you will not suck all the small town out of me. I will go on smiling at pedestrians as I pass them by, and I will keep on hugging people with whom I make acquaintance, and I will do more than just work and party and work and party.
What do I want, really?
I want a big library with books and books and even more books. I want to live in a city in a loft with high ceilings and windows and brick walls and wood floors and a living room that is also a studio where I can paint and my husband can play music. I want to travel and work in orphanages and see the world and the many beautiful cultures. I want to document my travels and mainly just write all the time about everything. I want to go to Ecuador or Nicaragua or somewhere to teach English or French or art or anything else for a year as I perfect my Spanish. I want to graduate university with new and better work habits where I am organized and don’t wait until the last minute to get things done. I want to live in real life: where Facebook isn’t the first thing I think of when I take a picture or accomplish something or a major event occurs. Instead I’ll think of printing the photo to hang it on my wall, and I’ll think of calling my grandma or friend to tell the news. I want to act with love, patience and compassion towards everyone. I want to write letters and mail them to my friends for their birthdays. I want to take a stranger out for coffee and learn from him and be inspired. I want to collect music and tea and have tea-drinking-music-listening gatherings. I want to learn guitar and write a song and sing it to someone I love. I want to live.
I want to really live.
What do you want?
Bertram Creek Regional Park
Kelowna, BC V1W 4J4
For the past three days, I have been enjoying the sun in summer dresses and shorts. Reflecting on the month of March leaves me astonished. The Earth took an opportunity to remind us that we have no control over our environment. We have no dominance over weather. March included everything from hail to sunshine, reminding us that we are vulnerable beings in respect to the Earth.
Sometimes selfies can look cool.
The only power lies within ourselves. It is how we choose to perceive these uncontrollable circumstances that allows us to carry on . Predictably, psychologists state that those with an internal locus of control live better lives. These hardy individuals know that a situation is what you make of it. If I am ever trapped in a violent hail storm again, maybe instead of being afraid I will chose to be amazed.
Fresh bread, raspberry jam, assorted fruit, and some brie cheese (brought back from France)
For now the storm is absent and the warm weather is welcome. Bertram Creek Regional Park is tucked away from the city with plenty of trees and beauty. A pile of blankets and flavourful food make for the ideal morning. Though I must admit that today sadness was roaming about, being Janèle’s last visit to Kelowna before Shanda’s departure for a great adventure, and possibly her last visit before I move away. We have no way of knowing how long it will be before the three of us are reunited.
It is important to remember that the power of our mind does not only apply to weather. It is easier to view our separation with eyes of sorrow, but it is more beneficial to see it as an opportunity. We will see each other again someday, and it is clear that we will appreciate it much more than if we lived side by side. It is easy to take people and things for granted when they are nearby. We are programmed to habituate. Being apart will make our visits significant and memorable.